


Purgatory Blues

by TAPKACS



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, M/M, Purgatory, What happens in Purgatory Stays in Purgatory
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-09
Updated: 2016-12-09
Packaged: 2018-09-07 11:02:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8798320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TAPKACS/pseuds/TAPKACS
Summary: Dean and Cas were in Purgatory together for a year. Of course there's more of a story to what happened than what they told Sam on their return.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Had a bad day. Wanted some Purgatory fic with Destiel feels. Couldn't find any that fitted the bill, so decided to write my own.

Nights in Purgatory were too long.

Dean gasped awake, hand scrabbling for his blade as he pulled himself bolt upright. His breaths came in desperate heaves as his eyes readjusted to his surroundings - grey forest surrounding the rocky alcove he had made his bed for the night - as he tried to spot any threats that might have crept up on him whilst he slept.

It didn't seem fair to Dean that he still required sleep, especially when it seemed like all the monsters that also called Purgatory home no longer needed to sleep since their deaths. Dean couldn't help but feel that this gave them an unfair advantage over the unfortunate still-living human who had been accidentally sucked into their afterlife with them. Sure, a conscious Dean was more than a match for any monster that wanted to go for him, but not even Dean was an amazing enough Hunter to be considered a threat to the supernatural whilst he slept.

Dean's need for the occasional lapse into unconsciousness wouldn't have been such an issue if Cas was still with him. The angel hadn't even needed to sleep on the mortal plane, let alone here. Dean wouldn't have needed to panic about being ambushed while he slept if Cas was here to keep an eye on him. Hell, he thought the angel would probably enjoy it, given how frequently Dean suspected he did exactly that back when he was on Earth.

Dean didn't even know how many nights he'd stayed in Purgatory now. He'd lost count somewhere around sixty, and that was awhile ago now. He hadn't had anything close to a full night's sleep since he got here - and that was coming from someone who thought a full night's sleep was averaging four hours a night. It was just as well he wasn't still on Earth, otherwise he might have started hallucinating by now from the sleep deprivation.

"Where the Hell are you, man?" Dean muttered to himself, rubbing a hand across his face as he pulled himself from the ground and left his makeshift shelter for the night.

Dean knew he had probably only been there for an hour or so, but that was still far too long to stay one place in Purgatory time.

Dean didn't understand why Cas ditched him when they were banished to Purgatory by an exploding Dick Roman. Dean knew that he and Cas had been through some shit recently - what with Cas betraying him and releasing the Leviathan into the world, breaking Sammy's mind before taking his madness on himself and then being too busy watching the bees to help Dean fix the mess he had made - but he hadn't wanted to believe that Cas would leave Dean to fight off the supernatural hoards on his own. 

Let's face it - there were not many places that could be worse for Dean Winchester than an entire plane of existence exclusively inhabited by creatures that he had probably killed at some point. Dean really could have used the assistance of an angel to watch his back, if he ever wanted the chance to actually be able to get back home before he got himself killed.

If Dean was being honest with himself, the reason why he wanted Cas back had nothing to do with his need for a supernatural bodyguard. Let's face it - Dean had wanted Cas back ever since he watched Cas go stumbling into that reservoir, face and trench coat stained by blood and black goo. Dean had always felt Castiel's absence like a constant ache in his chest. It was only worse, now that he was alone and scared - not that he would ever admit to the latter.

Dean wanted to be angry with Cas for leaving. He wanted to hate him for it, but somehow he could never bring himself to. All he wanted was for him to come back.

Dean stumbled across the leaf litter covering the poorly illuminated ground. He had yet to work out how night here was always bathed in moonlight, seeming Purgatory didn't actually have a moon. Dean sighed as he reached the apex of the hill he'd been climbing. He looked up through the trees, at the hollow night sky beyond, and wondered if somewhere, somehow, Cas was doing this exact same thing.

"I hope you're safe, wherever you are," Dean prayed, as he looked up at the night sky. "I miss you, man."

Dean shook his head and continued walking. He had already lingered too long.

\--------------------------------------------------------

Cas sat on his tree branch, arms curled around his legs as he looked up at the night sky above, and he listened to Dean's prayer, like he did every night.

_I miss you, man._

Cas felt an aching need in the pit of his stomach. He shook his head and buried it in his knees, breathing in an out slowly as he waited for the feeling to subside.

There was nothing Cas wanted more than to go to Dean's side, to wrap him in his arms and protect him from the horrors of this world they now inhabited. Unfortunately, Cas knew that doing so would achieve the exact opposite. He was a hunted man, and he would do anything in his power to protect Dean Winchester from the evils that were attracted to him.

Cas rubbed his eyes for tears that weren't there, and smiled ruefully.

"I miss you, too," he whispered, knowing that Dean would never hear his prayer.


End file.
